Friday, February 01, 2008

Things I don't understand #8...

...How Emmitt Smith gets paid to talk for a living.
Don't get me wrong. I love a running back. He brought me countless moments of joy that included 3 Super Bowl wins by my beloved Cowboys. But even before his second career began, I was pretty sure he wasn't the most eloquent of orators. My favorite quote of his from his playing days was the clincher for me. There's a saying, that I sometimes use in my crasser moments, that goes something like this, "Excuses are like butts, everybody's got one and they all stink." I'm sorry. So, I think at some point Mr. Smith was asked to address why his team wasn't winning, and I'm pretty sure he had heard this phrase previously, but when he opened his mouth, this is what came out, "Excuses are like butts, everybody who got one." Yes, that is the complete quote...everybody who got one. The Prosecution rests, your honor. But despite all the anecdotal evidence, he was hired to talk about football. Here's the worst of it. Most people think this is his first year in his broadcasting career because he just started with ESPN. But no! He actually spent all last year talking (nonsensically, I might add) on the NFL network. So I guess they could at least be given some sort of pass, but what's ESPN's excuse? Yeah, me neither. But apparently I'm not the only one who noticed how bad he is, even people who work for the same company decided to take a run at him. Enjoy.

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