Friday, January 13, 2006

The Book of Daniel

I am fully prepared to admit that I've become completely out of touch. I will admit that I am clueless and self-righteous and moralistic and a fundamentalist and whatever else you might find fitting. Just tell me. Tell me I'm the crazy one and I'll accept it.

So Wednesday night I sat down to watch the premiere of this "exciting new series". Yes, it aired on Friday but I didn't get around to it until Wednesday. Let's all take a moment and thank God for Tivo/DVR/PVR. Here's a brief synopsis I copied from the Dallas Morning News:
The Book of Daniel details the adventures of the Rev. Daniel Webster and his troubled family. His trials include: an alcoholic wife, drug-dealing daughter, oversexed high school son, gay college-age son, bisexual sister-in-law, adulterous father and a mother with Alzheimer's who's prone to making embarrassing remarks. A pot-smoking housekeeper in a posh residence oversees it all.

Amazingly enough, none of that stuff--including the appearance of Jesus as Daniel's happy-go-lucky joke popping buddy-- fazed me. I am fully prepared to believe that since ministers are, in fact, human they might be surrounded or related to those who make incredibly bad choices. We're all fallible, you know. Now this particular episode was 2 hours long. Yeah, I know. I had fought through a variety of possibly offensive scenarios and an hour and a half when Daniel shares some of his Vicodin stash with the Bishop before he begins a marriage counseling session with a fictional couple.

Once again, I've made it this far, and to some what I will describe next will pale in comparison to the deviantness to which I've already alluded, but nonetheless. Rev. Daniel begins the session with some questions about monetary issues, if they discussed kids, whatever. Then he asks, "So how's your sex life? Is everything ok?" I was dumbfounded. Neither member of the couple showed surprise or shock, but the prospective groom answers, "No," while the prospective bride answers, "Yes." The the groom adds, "She can't have sex without being stoned." Once again no shock or embarrassment registers on any of the faces; and no, we're not talking about the biblical stoned. The bride then asks, "Are we weird? Is there something wrong with us?" To which Daniel quickly assures them they are not. Oddly enough, in a parallel to the show, Jesus happened to be sitting next to me on the couch watching the show. As this exchange occurred Jesus and I looked at each other with eyebrows raised, turned back to the TV and simultaneously said, "What the...?" I then stopped the show and deleted it. I also deleted any future recordings.

So, to paraphrase the fictional prospective bride, am I weird? Is there something wrong with me? Does every marriage counseling session with a minister of the Gospel include questions about the couple's sex-life with the presumption that there already is one? Is a couple's admission to premarital sex and recreation drug use met with such nonplussed replies? Tell me! I don't know. I have an idea, though. And that's why I stopped watching the show. And it's not necessarily because I was offended or anything like that. It's just because the whole scene struck me as so completely unbelievable. I was reminded once again that they don't get it. They don't get faith, especially in God. They just don't get any of it.

So America, it's now up to you. Tell me, how crazy/unreasonable/disconnected/irrelevant am I.

Oh, and another thing. If you're gonna call it a dramedy, it's supposed to be funny.

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